If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize