Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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