youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
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