how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
