I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
