dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
