1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize