i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
