yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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