Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
