Walk of Shame. In a state park.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
I'm really busy with my period
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