The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
