no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
