erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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