So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
