Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
