Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize