I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
