No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize