Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
