absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
You ruined the universe
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
