You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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