My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize