It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize