Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
