goodnight i made you a song goodbye
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
So apparently I’m into choking now
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
