East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
