Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize