I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
