So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
