sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize