Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
