Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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