Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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