Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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