They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
