I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
