Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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