did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
