he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
