sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
is it fun? or sober?
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
