You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
