Dude my mom stole all your condoms
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize
