You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
