This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
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