omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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