Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
