Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
