I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
