how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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