Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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